Where The Calm Mama & Child began..
After graduating uni and working in, what I thought, was a soulless and meaningless corporate world, I booked myself a one way ticket to Australia. I spent my twenties travelling around and opened my eyes to new experiences, new types of people and a new way of life.
In a little town called Broome in West Australia I met my husband. He was working as a teacher in a remote Aboriginal community a few hours away and after dating for a little while, I decided to join him. We lived in a little place called Bidyadanga for a few years, getting to know the locals, soaking up their culture and way of life. After living there for a few years, I fell pregnant with my eldest son, Jack.
I had never properly held a baby, let alone knew how to care for one. All I knew was what I heard my parents’ say – ‘they shouldn’t be picked up too much, only feed when they are hungry and they must sleep in a cot, in a separate room.’
My husband and I spent more than I care to admit on a beautiful jarrah wooden cot, pram and moses basket. … all of which Jack HATED!
My son was going against everything I believed should happen: He was constantly glued to the boob, wouldn’t sleep unless being carried and couldn’t be put down at all!
He was a TOTAL shock to the system. I felt like I had been hit both physically and emotionally by a bus. I felt I was constantly fighting what I ‘should’ be doing, and what was the ‘right’ way to parent.
I was exhausted. Constantly. I never got more than two hours sleep at a time (if I was lucky!)
I had no family around and I was feeling very alone in this new world of parenting. By the time he was 3 months old, I was at breaking point so I got in touch with a baby sleep company. They sent me through a generic feed, sleep, play schedule for a child of his age and instructions on how to sleep train my baby with the promises that this was going to work…. Er, no, it didn’t!
It was after that incident, I decided to parent the way that came naturally and instinctively to me and that was to break the beliefs that I had grown up with and to parent with love, affection and nurture. It was only when he was older I discovered the term ‘High Needs ‘ baby and that I had effectively been attachment parenting.
When Jack was 14 months old we decided to return to Jersey UK, to be with my family.
Becoming a mother has allowed me to get to know myself. I now will always do what I feel is right for my children despite society’s expectations.
Being a mother has also helped me find my direction in life. With all the help and support I have received as a mother, I realised that my calling in life was to help make a positive difference to others around me, in particular, mothers and their children.
After we moved back to the UK, I began my degree in counselling. Whilst doing so, In 2014 I trained as Relax Kids Coach. This was such a positive move for me, as it was Relax Kids where I learnt the importance of a child’s mindfulness and positive thinking. Helping to boost a child’s confidence, self – esteem, ease anxiety, promote self-awareness and build resilience. All this are crucial to their well being in the present and also massively important in their future.
In 2019 I trained as a Post-Partum Doula, I want to offer new Mother’s the nurture and support that I didn’t have but so needed!
Post-Partum is such a raw, vulnerable time for women, it is a time we need to rest, recuperate and spend our time bonding and falling in love with our babies.
I am also certified as an Attachment Parent Educator. By being fully educated on the the positive neurological impact that attachment parenting has on children and I am so passionate in sharing this powerful message with other parents.
There are often demands on mothers needing to work, having to put their children into childcare and weekends been a two day blur of running around children’s sporting or party commitments. It is so crucial we build and strengthen a connection with your child and nurture their mindfulness in the limited time you do have together. This will enable them to improve their emotional well- being, build their resilience and create happier, calmer family.
Most importantly, I want to help establish a calm and happy Mama so together we can create generation of confident, balanced and content family.